It was (by our standards) a late start to the day as we did not need to check in until 11:30 and the check in was just a 20 min walk away. We walked down to Beach Road, this is obviously the social hub of Queenstown with loads of bars and restaurants. Checked in for the tour and as we had a little time to spare found a nice cafe and sat outside with a cup of coffee in very pleasant temperature.
The tour today is a trip on a vintage steamboat to Walters Peak Farm for a BBQ lunch and a demonstration of sheep shearing. We only do exotic as you know. 😉
We sat outside on the foredeck and were entertained all the way across by Asians taking photographs. Now in case you are unaware there are some pretty strict rules regarding taking photos for Asians and they are different for the “takee” i.e. the person whose photo is being taken and the “taker” the person taking the photo. Now generally speaking the takee is normally female and the taker is normally male however in some circumstances a female taker is allowed if the taker and the takee intend to swap roles part way through the exercise.
Rules for takees.
There are three approved poses any other poses are frowned upon.
The pose of the infinite contemplation. The takee should gaze wistfully towards the horizon with a contemplative look. It is not important where they are looking but they should ensure that their best side is towards the camera. They should NOT look directly at the camera or smile . Windswept hair or sunglasses are an option but should be used with caution. Very little landscape should be included in the shot.
The pose of the educated informer. The takee should hold their RIGHT arm out strainght with their fist clenched and their index finger pointing forwards. They should assume a look which suggest erudition and knowledge which they are trying to pass on to people less fortunate than themselves. Again it is important that their best side is towards the camera and that they are not smiling although looking slightly towards the taker to suggest that they are educating them is allowed.
The pose of the clown. This is more of a freeform pose although there have been some variations which are perennially popular. The first is the Kate pose which is a definite candidate on a boat. It is important that the takee is at the very front of the deck and the only person in shot. Then takee should have both arms extended away from the body and looking forward. Windswept hair is a definite plus. The downside of this pose however is that the takee’s face is facing away from the camera. The Victory pose is the simplest and is recommended for beginners. Any stance is permissible and the only requirement is that the right hand has the palm facing forward and the first two fingers raised in a V shape. For maximum effect the hand should be at head level. The Victory pose is the only pose where it is permissible to have two or more takees. The Clown pose has one simple requirement and that is that the takee should look slightly ridiculous. Care should be taken if using this pose to avoid injury to the takee. This is the only pose where looking directly at the camera is allowed and goofy smiling is encouraged.
Rules for Takers
All takers shall adopt the standard stance. This requires the feet to be set apart slightly wider that the takers shoulders with the left foot at least 300mm forward of the right foot. No allowance is given for left handed people to reverse this. The knees should be bent to an angle between 30 and 45 degrees and the buttocks should be thrust backwards to provide counter balance. The torso should be inclined forward by approximately 15 degrees. The phone or camera should be held 150mm from the face (note this use of traditional cameras with viewfinders is impossible) and the upper arms should be held directly away from the body making a pleasing triangle with the forearms. It is permissable to tilt the camera 30 degrees in either direction for artistic effect but care should be taken not to overdo this. After each exposure the taker shall show the takee the picture so that critical analysis can take place. After this analysis the takee will reset the pose and the taker will take another identical picture. This process will continue until the tour has completed or the next ice age has arrived whichever comes first.
There is another very rare taker. The Japanese photographer (Nipon Canon) and the rarer variant (Nipon Nikon). This species is easily identified by the large amount of very expensive camera equipment they are carrying and the propensity to take multiple pictures of seemingly uninteresting landscape whilst using gradated filters and fill in flash.
I did take a couple of snaps 😉
Takers and Takees at various stages of the process.
The rare Nipon Canon in it’s natural habitat.
A clown pose. I missed the best bit. This is the wind down.
We arrived at Walter Peak Farm after about 40 mins so it was quicker to watch the above than to write about it. There was a “Gormet BBQ lunch” and were all directed into a very posh restaurant. Chris and I were seated right by the open front so we had a great view back down the lake. Now imagine catering for about 300 people in a sitting, many of whom don’t speak english or are used to western food. Recipe for disaster right? Wrong the food was absolutely delicious with an amazing range of sides (I particularly liked the sautéed sprouts) and salads. They had BBQd chicken, home made german style sausage, lamb sweetbreads, pork, home grown lamb and beef all of which were cooked to perfection. For dessert I had a little lemon meringue, some sorbet and a little mochachino thing. The meal was washed down with a couple of pints hazy IPA for Chris and a cider for me. The whole thing ran like clockwork. Amazing.
We tried an Asian photo but it didn’t really work for us. Maybe I had my feet too close together.
After lunch there was a sheepdog demonstration and the reaction from the Asian visitors was lovely as I guess they had never seen anything like it before. The shepherd was from Shropshire so we had a bit of a chat and a picture with the dogs afterwards.
On the way back I’m fed up with taking photos of the landscape so head into the engine room. Proper old school engineering. Twin 220hp triple expansion engines fed by 2 boilers, steam powered twin condensate pumps and twin prop shafts through stuffing boxes. Bliss but it was a bit warm and I wouldn’t like to be the stoker.
Wandering back to the hotel we stop off in Pog Mahones Irish pub for a Guinness and a Kilkenny Red. We were wondering what Pog was short for but couldn’t find any reference but a bit more digging reveals that it it a corruption of Pog Mo Thoin which basically means Kiss My Ass.
Back to the hotel but this time it is uphill and Queenstown has some epic hills. We were both puffing hard by the time we got to the top.
So a great end to yet another great day.
XX🌳🧚🌳XX